Maybe it’s the shock that keeps us going




Periodically, we’re all amazed. Something happens so unexpectedly, so overwhelmingly out of the blue, so outside the realm of practical probabilities, that our minds dare not try to envision it happening.

You know what I’m talking about — something so surprisingly sudden that we are in total bewilderment. Like after seeing the umpteenth commercial for Youth Restoring Libido and Total Body Regeneration miracle drug. All you did was mention it in passing during that next Victoria’s Secret commercial, and she laughed so hard that she spit out her dentures.

Or maybe it’s kinda like when you’ve accepted the fact that your beloved is about as athletic as some delusional self-appointed reigning queen, seated upon her throne, dictating commands to her one lone subject. Or possibly merely someone who sits all day long on her “padded seat,” watching soap operas and eating those fancy nut-covered chocolate things, but she announces she wants some clothing item made of spandex.

Sadly, you’re still waking up night after night with cold chills, spewing foul language from the deepest sleep provided by Ambien, as the one repeating nightmare has you writhing in torment because you can’t get that spandex vision out of your mind.

Anyway, here at La Grimm Ranchero House of Surprises, we are in a constant state of shocked amazement. Most mornings, I wake up as God gives me another day to see what mischief I can get into.  The missus awakens every afternoon surprised that God has given me another day or that she must continue to pay some penance for something she cannot recall ever being that serious. Of course, oddly, there are a number of people who read this weekly column and take it upon themselves to tell me they, too, are surprised that I am still alive!

Maybe it’s the constant shock the missus and I give to each other that keeps us going. Then again, maybe it’s God’s matchless grace and mercy. Imagine the look of amazement we all will have when we get to heaven, see our Savior, and then see who else made it! I imagine they’re gonna be just as shocked and amazed to see us, too!

Warning: These musings may be serious or may be humorous. Enjoy! H.R. Grimm is a self-described lovable, prone to blunt, witty, tending toward sarcastic, saved-by-grace, constantly thinking storyteller. Grimm, a military veteran, and his wife now call La Vernia home. Email reader@lavernianews.com.